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older cousin, admired athlete, social leader), using whatever means are available to reduce resistance, such as attention, special privileges, money or other gifts, promises or bribes, even outright threats. Boys are not seeking to be sexually abused or exploited.(All my women clients who report this symptom admit it only comes when reading, but I have a small sample.) It should be clear that the effects of childhood sexual abuse are long term and insidious. The important thing is to accept that if ‘something doesn’t feel right’, it probably isn’t. Tell me what is sexual about a 2 or 3 year old running and giggling because she got out of the bathroom after her bath and is enjoying the escape.And that there is no shame for what was done to you. Kids are not sexual – unless a perpetrator has taught them to be.It is important to understand that males can respond to sexual stimulation with an erection or even an orgasm – even in sexual situations that are traumatic or painful. In an otherwise lonely life (for example, one lacking in parental attention or affection – even for a brief period), the attention and pleasure of sexual contact from someone the boy admires can feel good.But in reality, it’s still about a boy who was vulnerable to manipulation.